Toilets: The Bottom Line

Discussion in 'Suggestions' started by Daedalon, Feb 5, 2021.

  1. Daedalon

    Daedalon Lieutenant

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    Laugh if you will, but someone had to bring up this smelly topic. I figured I'd do it and spare some other soul the humiliation of making this thread some day. Don't worry, I've got your back!

    I was happy to see the Empyrion team on a roll when we got the update that allows players to actually sit on chairs, sofas and benches, which made a lot of previously decorative objects functionally useful. And I was amused to find the toilet included in that list.

    However, after sitting around thinking about this for awhile, I realized that the toilet immediately makes a flush sound the instant you sit on it, rather than when you get off. I'm a very detail-orientated person and this type of thing really drains me. In fact, it seems pretty crappy. You don't want to think about what the next person who opens that toilet gets to find, especially in a game where it is normal for people to eat 15 or more hamburgers in a day.

    This is, of course, an incredibly trivial detail in the cosmic scope of Empyrion, so I'd understand if the developers decide to put a lid on it, but my suggestion is that one day someone spares a minute or two to change the flush sound to trigger when a player departs from the toilet, rather than when they first sit down on it. I think it would be tubular if you could take care of all the problems, even the ones at the bottom.

    Now, I honestly can't handle the suspense of waiting to see if this suggestion will become contested, supported silently with many likes, or if anyone will be brave enough to pitch in support verbally and attach their username to a thread discussing toilets.

    For now, carry on, have fun, over and out!
     
    #1
  2. Darinth

    Darinth Commander

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    Someone erect a porcelain statue to this man. Deep in my bowels, I know this to be important.
     
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  3. Vermillion

    Vermillion Rear Admiral

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  4. Alhira_K

    Alhira_K Captain

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    I think the devs have some other sh*t to deal with right now.
     
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  5. Nimmanu

    Nimmanu Lieutenant

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    The devs will surely have to plumb the depths of their knowledge to flush out this problem.
     
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  6. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    I agree the toilet needs work. I was a plumbing designer for 30+ years. Toilet rooms were my bread and butter, so to speak.

    To be fair, there is no evidence of a flushing mechanism here, so it must be automatic. If you used the "facilities" in stadiums or airports, it was not unusual for them to flush even before you sat down. But I digress. Along with the flush-on-contact system used, you may have noticed the water closet is HUGE!
    2021-01-27 (1).png 2021-01-27.png

    I find this more concerning.

    Besides, the lid stays down so no one sees what was left by the previous occupant.:rolleyes:
     
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  7. Nimmanu

    Nimmanu Lieutenant

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    This made me laugh for like, 2 hours the first time I saw it.
     
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  8. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    Thank you.
    I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waiter.:cool:
     
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  9. Kaloriaa

    Kaloriaa Commander

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    Toilets is both a blessing and a curse. Woe to those that stumble on filthy toilets.
     
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  10. Pembroke

    Pembroke Lieutenant

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    Now, now, doesn't that smack of a little bit of speciesism? Surely we don't want to hang any "No Desert Golems" signs on our toilet stalls? Let's not turn our backsides to the more robust folk of us.

    But, yes, I have to agree with the OP: flushing it when you sit is not only counter productive but downright disgusting for both the current and the next user. If the devs would take on this, admittedly dirty, problem I'd like to even put forth an additional suggestion: Add a signal logic support to the toilet. We could then avoid all embarrassing situations arising from the more absentminded people by having the toilet flush when you enter a motion detection field. That would ease the mind of anyone entering that he'd see something that he'd rather not see, and everyone would be happier for it.
     
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  11. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    Amen to that, for I have seen and had to clean some of the filthiest toilets in a modern society.:eek:
     
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  12. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    1. You're assuming Golems can be potty-trained. And even if they could be, what makes you think the plumbing could handle their guano? Have you opened one up to see what's inside??
    2. I thought I illustrated that the lid stays down concealing previous poopery as well as eliminating any odious odors escaping. You should appreciate this since you let Golems use your commode.

    If you look at the 2nd illustration, you'll notice the hiney sinks into the lid. Excremental deposits are made via osmosis thru the suit and lid thereby maintaining a seal. Can't get much more hygienic than that.;)

    Mind you, we should probably have washer/dryer block added to the game as i imagine there would be some residue/dingleberries.
     
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  13. Kaloriaa

    Kaloriaa Commander

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    Toilets can get very nasty really quick. Reason i'm hesitant to go to public restroom and find a filthy surprise waiting for me.

    I remember one time going to a rest stop walking into the nastiest surprise toilet plugged up you know what in it an water to the brim and toilet paper everywhere.
     
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  14. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    1973. I was an enlisted man stationed at a small Army post in Germany. Saturday night would find all 6 toilets packed full to the brim the floor flooded. :eek: I sometimes wonder what the last guys had to do to do their doo-doo. In truth, I don't want to know. This went on for weeks until somebody finall fixed the plumbing. We should have been given haz-mat suits for the clean-up.:(
     
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  15. Nimmanu

    Nimmanu Lieutenant

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    Well, this thread stinks now.
     
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  16. ChumSickle

    ChumSickle Captain

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    I have never found an idea more inane, pointless, and a waste of time that I now immediately want remedied in the game.
     
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  17. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    No. I keep telling you the lid stays down, there is no stink! ;)
     
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  18. Nimmanu

    Nimmanu Lieutenant

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    I can't hear you over the flushing noise... :D
     
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  19. Track Driver

    Track Driver Rear Admiral

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    :p
     
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  20. japp_02

    japp_02 Commander

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    So many words for a toilet?! You guys already know that toilets help against indigestions, don't you? What more do you want, a portable one maybe unlockable at level 25, c'mon...
     
    #20

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